Captivating title right?
Well this is what my days have looked like lately…
Everything and nothing all at the same time.
Closing the studio in the Glen amidst this year long transition and change has triggered so many aspects within me.
Who could have known?
Creative overflow, tears, trust, regret, fear, nostalgia, bliss, gratitude and total despair…
All in one woman you ask? All at the same time?
Why yes indeed… If you ran into me anytime in the last few weeks, you either caught me in tears, elated or just plain and simply very confused.
Being a mama or two, running a household, fulfilling a dream and keeping food on the table… That’s what I have been up to. It’s not easy, but I wouldn’t have it any other way.
This is where the woodpecker comes in….
Yesterday, in one of my irrational “What have I done”moments, I heard someone knocking on my door…. Thinking it was the babysitter, or a neighbour, I opened the door and nobody was there…. Well, not a person anyhow….
So here was a gorgeous great spotted woodpecker, just prancing up the tree beside my studio…. I looked at him/her and they flew away… That was odd….
And then flood gates opened. I started to re-root and realize that all I have to do is listen…
Why do I get myself in such a fuss and worry so much?
Here is nature, literally knocking at my door…
And what do Woodpeckers have to say?
They are believed to be mother earth’s drummers…. The heartbeat.
The reminder. trust your intuition…
We are all part of her.
I sometimes forget that I am not in control of everything in constant parenting mode and multi-tasking mode, where every event, and I mean everything needs to be calculated on some scale for how long it will take, what priority is it, and whether I actually have time to get into it….
Perspective. I see it now.
I try to always live in gratitude as I know I am blessed…. Oh, I am blessed, but sometimes the imminence of my daily routines and responsibilities just wear me down….
Sooooooo, Here she is…. Just a wee Opal metaphor for my life at the moment, and many others I am certain…. She represents all women and mamas, who fear their fire will die with the daily grind of life. The embers are always there when you are ready to re-kindle… Just be ready for a tear or two 🙂
Your beauty and abundance still exists, even if you don’t see it.
Your spirit, your fire, they too stay by your side for whenever you are ready to heed their call.
Your pain, your joy all make you the beautiful abundant being that you are.
Your heart beat, is connected with the heart beat of mother earth, always, even if you can’t feel it.
and when you really need the nudge, she sends messengers!
Thank you little woodpecker for coming and knocking on my door. You came at the perfect time!